Pluak Daeng Bike Theft Gone Awry: Critsana’s Comical Chase and Ironic Downfall

In the quiet, early hours of July 22, the picturesque district of Pluak Daeng in Rayong became the unlikely stage for a dramatic, albeit comical, chase that could have been plucked straight from a slapstick movie. As dawn painted the sky with the first strokes of light, an aspiring bike thief unwittingly set the scene for an unforgettable morning that locals would soon recount with both disbelief and amusement.

It all began when CCTV cameras captured the antics of a would-be thief loitering around a grocery store near the iconic Khao Noi Intersection. This man, identified later as 38-year-old Kritsana, appeared to be killing time, presumably weighing his options, when the opportunity he had been waiting for arrived—a white motorbike parked conveniently close, beckoning him for a not-so-quick getaway.

Assuming the role of a nonchalant shopper, Kritsana’s charade lasted just long enough for him to make his bold move. In a flash, he was astride the motorbike, starting the engine with the sort of self-assurance you’d expect from a seasoned robbery artist. However, he was clutching onto something that screamed amateur—a 30cm knife, both in hand and metaphorically, on his luck!

But fortune doesn’t always favor the bold. Enter Suchin, a local woman and the rightful owner of the bike, whose watchful eyes caught the heist unfolding in live action. With the precision of an eagle-eye on its prey, she wasted no time. Fueled by adrenaline and an unyielding resolve, she mounted another motorcycle and embarked on a chase that narratively belonged in the annals of extraordinary crime tales.

The chase sprawled across a 1-kilometer stretch, a pursuit marked by the thief’s sheer desperation and Suchin’s unwavering determination. Each second loomed like eternity, but fate was about to unleash its own sardonic twist. The high-speed pursuit came crashing to an end quite literally as Kritsana lost control, careening off into the roadside grass.

What followed was a turn of events too tragicomically painful to script. Even before Kritsana could master the art of the getaway, his own weapon—a knife he’d intended for intimidation—became the inadvertent harbinger of his undoing. As he tumbled, the unyielding blade found its way into his stomach, leaving him facedown, bleeding profusely, and poignantly at the mercy of the morning heist-turned-misadventure.

Help arrived quickly where it was least expected. Local rescue workers, surprised by how the morning played out, rushed to his assistance. Among the rescuers was 18-year-old Somkid, who later recounted the situation with an air of disbelief, “We found the man face down, heavily bleeding from his abdomen. It looked as if he had stabbed himself in the crash.”

As the surreal nature of the incident unfolded, three knives were recovered from the scene, adding layers to this bizarre tale of ineptitude. Meanwhile, at the police station, Suchin, the relieved but unfazed owner of the motorbike, handed over compelling CCTV footage, choosing not to press charges, content with simply retrieving her property.

The officers of the Pluak Daeng Police Station have since taken the motorbike and all three knives as evidence. With the suspect recuperating under hospital supervision, their investigations continue, preparing for a future that might see Kritsana swap tales of attempted thievery for accounts of cautionary hilarity among his peers.

And so, as Rayong residents wade through their morning coffee, this botched burglar’s faux pas provides an unexpected dash of entertainment — and perhaps, a moral laden with laughter: in the game of theft and irony, the house doesn’t always lose!